DYKS – Week 2 NFL Picks


The roller coaster of emotions of being a sports fan, specifically a New York Giants fans can be difficult at times. This past Sunday night may have been the most difficult since the Flipper Anderson game for myself and Giant Fans. I just experienced a seizure and blacked out writing that name, for a Giants fan it’s like saying freaking Voldermort at Hogwarts. This past one hurt even more due to the opponent and all my acquaintances that are Cowboy fans. I am not sure I want to call them friends anymore because I do not want to even talk to them because the game will the first thing out of their mouth.

I regretfully wrote a running log of my emotional ride on opening night and the next day. All those non-Giant fans can enjoy the next 1,000 words or so, for my F-Men brothers just scroll down to the picks. Oops did I just write F-Men sorry for that typo the F key is right next to the G key.

1st Quarter

The game starts but I miss the first seven minutes of the quarter because my two year old vomited in bed. I didn’t realize it was a harbinger of what was to come later in the night. I finally sat down to watch after rinsing the bed linens and pillows with a garden hose and I am shocked the only thing I have missed is part of the long methodical death march of the Cowboys opening drive. I admit it felt like a victory for the Giants defense when they only allowed a field goal. The one thing I took from the drive is the Cowboys losing Demarco Murray will not matter that O-Line mauled the Giants and Romo had as much time as he needed.

The Giants had the ball and on 3rd and 8, the Cowboys jump offside and Eli threw a risky pass thinking it’s a free play but….there is no flag. Uh oh this is not a good sign, it means Jerry had the ref’s on the party bus again wining and dining with the cheerleaders. If “Deflategate” is an issue how can the Cowboys having game officials on an all expense paid party bus not an issue. As my friend described the situation so eloquently “Would you want your chief of police partying with the mob?”

2nd Quarter

The GE commercial is driving me nuts with their dorky manufacturer that is a new CNC programmer. The kid is trying so hard to impress everyone and no one gives a rats ass. The kid needs to take that damn sledge hammer and smash his parents coffee table, could he possibly have a bigger dick for a father. He also needs a new set of friends, they don’t give a shit about him or his new job at GE, move on.

Jason Garrett nice job using both challenges in the first half, if there is a big play that needs challenging the rest of the game you’re screwed. I hope you are happy you denied the Giants a first down when they are their own 20 yard line. Tom Coughlin is a far superior coach. (Ummm. I think I am going to regret that one)

Luke McNown you are the man by cashing on that Verizon sponsorship as a back up QB. Well done.

3rd Quarter

PARTY BUS! THAT FREAKING PARTY BUS!!!!!!!! That is the only way I can explain that crappy interference call on Antonio Rodgers-Comartie in the end zone. Instead of a field goal now the Cowboys get a Touchdown! What a crappy call!!! (The NFL admitted this past week the officials blew two calls, the pass interference being the first, the second I will get to later.)

The fantasy football commercial with Victor Cruz and Odell Beckham was not very good or funny but then I see the scar. The long scar down the middle of Victor Cruz’s knee is awful looking. Wow I hope he can come back after that injury maybe Freddy Kruger did the patella surgery, could this be why JPP told the Giants to buzz off when they visited him in the hospital. Great call by Victor Cruz playing Julio Jones over Odell Beckham in fantasy football.

4th Quarter

This is where it becomes ugly.

Giants intercept Romo on a deflected pass and return it for a Touchdown that gets overturned but gives the Giants the ball on the 1 and they run it in a few plays later. That’s when I email my friend a long time Giants fan. This email exchange explains it all.

Me: Spags (Giants Defensive Coordinator) – That is all.

NY Fan: I knew you would stay up. (I told my buddy on Friday I was not watching the whole game I didn’t want to be a zombie on Monday)

NY Fan: Long way to go.

Me: Couldn’t resist. Here comes the hurry up offense and prevent defense. Hold your breathe the next 7 minutes of regulation. Jerry must of got one hell of a party bus for the officials b.s. interference penalty.

NY Fan: Girls for the refs? Terrible call.

Giants on the one yard line and they just were stopped on two runs and on a 3rd down play action pass. (This third down pass was the second blown call as Daniel Fells was held in the end zone. I am not blaming the officials for that one as they were probably just as shocked as the rest of us with the Giants play calling.)

Me: Go for it! Go for it!

The Giants kick the field goal to go up six points.

NY Fan: Should have gone for it.

NY Fan: Spag’s better be aggressive

Cowboys march down the field are on the doorstep of scoring the game winning touchdown.

Me: Oh boy. Witten scares me here. (Auto-correct changed Witten to Written in the actual email)

Witten scores on the next play.

Me: I am calling out sick tomorrow.

NY Fan: I am sick. Disgusting. Never touched Romo all game.

The Next Day

I survive the day and do all I can to avoid contact with any Cowboy fans.

I hear the tail end of the interview of Eli Manning on WFAN. Eli states he told Rashad Jennings if they let you score fall down on the one inch line. What!? Really!?

I text my brother “the Joker” and my buddy “NY Fan”.

Me: The eli interview made we want to throw up again. He instructed Jennings to go down on 1st and 2nd down if the Cowboys let him score. WTF if you go up 10 the game is over

the Joker: I was on ESPN radio last night going nuts…Why not go for it on 4th down and make them drive 99 yards. Everyone and their brother knew 6 points wasn’t gonna do shit.

Me: I was saying the same thing. Go for it!

NY Fan: Are you kidding me? Now I’m really pissed.

Me: So Stupid. Not like you were up one and TD makes a one possession game it’s 10 points. They need a TD, onside kick and FG. Although I am sure they could F it up.

the Joker: I haven’t been this upset over a sporting event since Mr. T beat Rocky.

About a half hour goes by an no response from NY Fan and I am getting a bit concerned. All is well he was at the gym and distracted by a young lady resembling  a certain person from Full Metal Jacket that would love you long time. Rumor is she was also on the officials party bus provided by Jerry Jones.

NY Fan: Sorry distracted by a female at the gym. Yeah, I could see them blowing the onside kick. Can’t afford to be dumb, not enough talent.

I later get directed by NY Fan to a New York Post article where Rashad Jennings confirms he could of scored on one of the two running plays. Please, Please do not tell me anymore!!!! The Giants need to stop talking about the game and move on before that hole gets deeper. I need to move on to the picks.

Last week our guest Ray Elliott had a rough week going 2-3 with just the Carolina Panthers and Dolphins covering. The Dolphins made Ray sweat and most of our DYKS guys using a late punt return touchdown to cover vs. the skins. This week our guest is Steve Cervizzi Jr., also known as the Panda in these parts, a long time high school football and baseball coach in Eastern Connecticut. He is a die hard Patriots fan and recent recipient of the Golden Beer Can award thanks to his Deliverance impersonation at a recent party. Hope his picks are better than Ray’s or the guest prognosticators will start hearing Banjo’s.

My lock of the week is the Giants, no matter the spread. No I am not a hopeless fan boy that always picks the Giants. Coughlin will have them focused and they will play like a desperate team, as they should their season is in Jeopardy with a loss!

I liked the Broncos Thursday night because Peyton Manning was 13-0 versus Kansas City (now 14-0), he was playing angry due to the doubters after last week, their defense is pretty tough and they were getting 3.5 points. I like the Patriots this week for similar reasons, their 572-3 record versus the Buffalo Bills with Tom Brady at quarterback and the Bills mouthing off about how good they are after week 1. I am a bit nervous though because Rex Ryan has beaten the Patriots with less talent and Mark Sanchez as his quarterback.

The Cardinals look like a good pick on the road even though I hate picking against a home dog that is going to be desperate. Cards have a solid defense, a great coach in Bruce Arians and a healthy Carson Palmer and the Bears have Jay Cutler.

AK47 lock, lock, lock, lock (yes he used 4 locks when he emailed me) of the week is the Chargers getting 3.5 in Cincinnati. I am not sure I would go with the west coast team coming off a win having to play a 1:00 game on the East Coast.

Enjoy Week 2 and the DYKS guys picks for this football weekend.

Standings after Week 1

Last Week Name W L Overall Win Pct.
4-0 East Coast Bronco 4 0 1.000
4-1 The Worm 4 1 0.800
4-1 MJ Madness 4 1 0.800
3-2 Greenwell 39 3 2 0.600
3-2 The Joker 3 2 0.600
3-2 Bear 3 2 0.600
2-3 Guest 2 3 0.400
1-2 Jonuts 1 2 0.333
1-3 AK47 1 3 0.250


Week 2 Picks

Do You Know Sports Guy The Worm AK47 East Coast Bronco MJ Madness Greenwell 39
Game 1 Broncos +3.5 Steelers -7.5 Rams -3.5 Skins +3.5 Rams -3.5
Game 2 Pats +0.5 Panthers -3.5 Ravens -6.5 Pats +0.5 Texans +3.5
Game 3 Giants -3.5 Titans +2.5 Eagles -5.5 Phins -6.5 Cardinals -2.5
Game 4 Cardinals -2.5 Vikings -2.5 Jets +7.5 Bears +2.5 Titans +2.5
Game 5 Chargers -3.5 Titans +2.5 Bengals -3.5
Do You Know Sports Guy The Joker Bear Jonuts Guest                           the Panda
Game 1 Rams -3.5 Rams -3.5  Bills -0.5 Packers -3.5
Game 2 Lions +2.5 Pats + 0.5  49ers +7.5 Pats +0.5
Game 3 Phins -6.5 Phins -6.5  Lions +2.5 Ravens -6.5
Game 4 Titans +2.5 Saints -11.5  Skins +3.5 Cardinals -2.5
Game 5 Jets +7.5 Colts -7.5 Bengals -3.5

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